Le commencement de la fin

It is now the beginning of the end of my sojourn in France. Yesterday I had my first "last": my cross country class. My coach gave me a nice little farewell - it's a small group and my departure reduces its size by about 20%... For some reason it was really sad to leave, even though I didn't form any close friendships with them. It was just something that had become part of my routine, and with the realization that that routine is drawing to a close, I felt a sudden twinge of regret. And that's just the first of many goodbyes...

But other than the underlying sadness, the next week and a half should be fun - lots of parties to celebrate the end of the year! It will feel really good to get my finals out of the way. And of course I have Christmas to look forward to! I'm so torn. I want to make the most out of the next 10 days and hang on to every remaining moment as if I could somehow catch the sand falling through the hourglass and keep it from slipping by - but there's a part of me that gets frustrated (because obviously that doesn't work) and is just impatient to leave. It's like, "Why get any closer to these people, why spend any more time developing a deeper appreciation for the culture, when I am just about to leave?" Instead of a slow and painful separation over the next fortnight I want to do the band-aid approach: just rip it off all at once! But that urge doesn't last for long when I realize that it's well worth it to have one more pastry, one more party, one more tram ride, one more French conversation...

It will be so bizarre when I get back, because suddenly I'll see how much I've changed. I don't think I've realized it yet but I really have metamorphosed significantly. (For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction: Just as I had to adjust to the culture shock when I got here, of course I will have to readapt to my old ways and customs.) It should be interesting...

So yesterday I was invited to dinner chez the Hills, who, despite their rather Anglo-Saxon last name, are a very French older couple from my conversation class. We spoke in French, however. They are very kind! The dinner lasted - get this! - almost five hours! We started at 7:30 and left after midnight! I couldn't believe it. It was very good though, and they are so easy and interesting to talk to. We started with a traditional apératif, which lasted a good hour, then had a four-course meal - salad, some kind of big flat fish that they cooked whole, head and all, and a round of fabulous cheeses, then a dessert that resembled ice cream but was made with eggs. Then coffee, which lasted another hour. It was quite the affair!

We spoke of many things, including Christmas traditions - a great French one that has become less practiced but which used to be popular is called the "reveillant" (meaning, the wake-up). French families used to have a humongous Christmas dinner directly following the midnight mass on Christmas Eve - so, from about 1 to 4 in the morning! Then they get up at noon the next day and eat a big Christmas lunch as well. Isn't that wild? There's also the grisly tale/Christmas carol of St. Nicolas, where three little children are chopped into little pieces and preserved by a butcher, only to be raised from the dead (and presumably reassembled?) by St. Nick seven years later. Hmmm. Okay... Christmas nightmares... It's kind of funny though, isn't it? Mme Hill also gave me a German recipe for gingerbread that I will have to try out when I get home! It's really good.

So it's nice that the dinner didn't go much later (in fact, it ended at the perfect hour), because the boîtes de nuit open at 12:30. So I was able to go to the TONUS of our kind of partner school, l'Ecole Polytechnique. Have I already described those? I went to one before so maybe I did... School fundraiser in a night club and so on. (Probably wouldn't get away with that in America!) Needless to say, staying out until 5 am was NOT what my cold needed. Don't worry, my host mom already took me to task. :) I plan to spend the weekend recovering from my folly. But it was well worth it. I ran into at least a dozen people that I know and it was a good opportunity to have a last hoorah with them.

Plus French guys just have this way of making you feel beautiful. Don't get any ideas now, this is a PG-rated weblog - I don't lead that interesting of a life, ha ha, and I'm glad of it - but anyway, I'm just saying that there is something in their charm and the way they look at you and talk to you that makes you feel appreciated. I'm not even talking about night clubs here, I think it's a generally acknowledged cultural thing. They are definitely different than American guys. Not necessarily better because I think they are equally immature (if not more) in certain (emotional) ways. But here it is not cool - as it is in the U.S. - to not care. Indifference, aloofness, etc. are not valued. For the French, their actions are normal, but in comparison with American guys, they are decidedly gallant! Taking your coat or your bag, opening or holding doors, offering you something to drink when you come over, complimenting you, etc. Maybe I am idealizing them a little bit, but I know I will miss that slightly higher level of special treatment when I get back home!

Okay, so like I said, I have a potentially boring weekend ahead: Sleep, study, sleep, study. Woo hoo. At least I won't have too much time to be sad. :) And yet - things always seem to get more interesting than I expect here, so stay tuned for next time...